A big sigh of relief for Socktron. He made it through Halloween unscathed, untouched, uneaten, and undeniably in good humor. It's not like he's a pumpkin, he was in no danger of being trashed so early in the Autumn season.
Where do all the poor pumpkins go? Did you know we are the only species to breed a specific type of vegetable for a holiday, during which, the pumpkin is exposed to carving, smashing, and ultimately, a slush pile in the woods.
The end of all gourds typically begins with the start of Christmas season, which begins earlier and earlier each year, shortening the life spans of gourds everywhere. It's a miracle any gourd stays alive long enough to see the Thanksgiving holiday anymore.
In fact, some don't.
In only a few years, people will forget the true meaning of Thanksgiving entirely, which is, of course, well, you know, somewhat equal to the stupidity of celebrating Columbus Day. Soon, its only purpose will be to signify the middle of the Christmas decorating season, which will begin promptly at the end of September.
This is foremost a branding issue. Gourd companies need to start thinking about the future now before it's too late.
For instance, Socktron is on track to become a full-time holiday gourd. As long as he keeps, and he shows no signs of un-keeping, there is no end in sight to the amount of joy he can bring.
Of course, Thanksgiving is the big one — the pinnacle Gourdian event of not just the season, but the entire year. At this time, Socktron and his little gourd friends will take their rightful place as the centerpiece of the feast.
But what happens when Thanksgiving becomes just a day to celebrate Christmas decorating. Then it's on to snow globes, mistletoe, trees, and stupid hats to put on dogs that make them look hilarious. Where do gourds fit in then? Where is their future?
So for this reason, to extend the gourd joy, Socktron will be a Christmas gourd, too. And then a New Years gourd.
And then a Martin Luther King, Jr. Day gourd. And then a Valentine's Day gourd, a President's Day gourd, an Easter gourd, and so on and so on. Remember, decorative gourds don't have to be just for Fall. I encourage gourd owners everywhere to try and use their gourds for other holiday seasons.
Where's the harm in that?
If you enjoyed this article may I recommend that you click on that little heart-shaped icon below. Also, feel free to sign-up to receive an email each and every time a brief humorous piece of awesomeness is ready for enjoyment.