Home is Where the Heart Is: Goodbye Apartment

After seven wonderful years of parking our butts in this tiny little apartment, crammed away in this cozy garden level abode, stuffing our brains with a lifetime of warm and fuzzy memories, it is time to say goodbye. And we will miss this place, this apartment, this home we’ve had for those seven wonderful years. It has treated us well and provided us with a sneaky little headquarters, tucked closely into a main artery of the city, with big windows, an old blue carpet, and a suspiciously rusty bathtub—all at garden level prices.

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53 Maintenance Requests and Counting: Return of the Poo Sewage

The very first thing I did today upon awakening once again into this beautiful world was to make a wish, from the bottomless and deepest depths of my heart, that our bathroom toilet would begin yet another flabbergasting flooding disaster. When it comes to bathroom flooding, this is not my first rodeo. More like the seventh.

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The Movember Bewhiskering: Another Mustache Sprouts Its Wings

It’s that time of year again folks. The month when millions, perhaps even billions of men around the world start reforesting their upper lips again for 30-whisker-filled days of brotastical unity—all in a giant effort to raise money and awareness for men’s health.

I call it: The Bewhiskering.

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The Horrific Spilling of a Tremendously Large Purple Smoothie in My Office Cubicle

Let me ask you something. How many workplace office carpets did you completely destroy today?

At 7:15 I was at my desk, in my chair, ready for action. I began rifling through messages after warming up my dual computer monitors; ready to peruse my workload, man the phones, and batten down the Google Docs.

And then … before I even had the chance to slurp it down … the smoothie uncontained itself.

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