I’m happy to report that here in New England, summer is finally on its way.
Don’t believe it?
Just turn the dial of your telly over to the local news station and you’ll see what I’m talking about.
Read MoreSeveral Good Reasons Why My Wife Should Be Allowed to Legally Whack Pedestrians with a Pool Noodle
Look! Up ahead! Three aloof pedestrians stand around a smartphone in the middle of the sidewalk.
But why? Why did they choose to stand right there?
Don’t they know the space they selected for their powwow is typically used one-hundred percent of the time for walking? Even a fool knows not to do that. Right?
Read MoreThought Catalog: 6 Life Lessons I Learned While Trying To Meditate During ‘Vanderpump Rules’ →
Hey! Nothing to see here. But I did want to post a link to my latest published article which can be found on Thought Catalog right now. What are you waiting for? Go read it! You're running out of time. Just CLICK ON THE TITLE!
A Thorough Account of What Turned Out to Be A Really Cool Alien Invasion
I always thought there would be way more giant robots, you know? With laser beams shooting out of their giant robot eyes and destroying everything in their path with unrelenting precision and sheer brute force.
Then there would be the little green aliens controlling them—those little bastards—terrorizing us (emotionally) with weird noises and slimy goo. They would be not only unstoppable, but most definitely, and without any doubt, totally obsessed with annihilating us.
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